Where's your wish?! ><

I wish I have supah powers!

granted, but God divided the universe by zero, so every micron in existence is fucked, and you're trapped in the voids of nothingness.


I wish I had some Denny's right now...

Granted, but as the Denny's waiter walked up to your door to deliver your food (which at this time, shall be delivery since it's such an intense wish...) he steps on a toe-popper land mine, which was inconveniently placed at your door step by your fat dog, Paco. Now the company is suing you for all your worth. You are now an employee at Denny's working as a chef, and eat there constantly. As a result, you grow fat despite your otherwise fast metabolism, and you start hating the food that you oh so loved...

I wish I had an endless, non-spoiling supply of chicken...

granted but your chicken gets reanimated in your bodies and kills you from within

i wish for a goat guitar and goat guitar skills

Granted but the your goat guitar had a catch, the goat is alive and it eats human flesh. So as you play your guitar, the goat gnaws away at your flesh. Your goat guitar skills are second to none, but the fact that your dying doesn't help you any.

I wish I could control time...

granted, but you controlled it to go back in time, and went too far back, to the age of primordial soup. Once there, you suddenly sneeze, so now, in the present day, everyone in the world has become giant blobs of God knows what.


I wish I'd move out already

granted, but you get a horrible flu with fever and all, and cant do anything but being in bed, not enjoying the weekend, time with friends or even wow.


I wish my new tattoo stopped itching

Granted, but you soon discover the reason your tattoo stopped itching is because you scratched your epidermal layer, dead. Your dead skin starts peeling and falls to your carpet floor. All sorts of insects come and devour your skin, and soon your carpet floor. You discover the insects too late, at this time you must now install new carpet flooring and cover your exposed flesh.

I wish work ended now...

granted, your work ended with the rest of the world as the world ended...

I wish gas was not expensive anymore... (that shit is killing my pocket)

Granted, but gas has become soo cheap that it's practically free. The fact that gas is free, people have begun to use it wastefully. The earth's gas resources have depleted, and now our cars and other mechanics are useless. Man-kind has started to desperately search for gas, and this desperation has driven several mad. The world becomes a barren wasteland, with the few sane members of humanity fighting for their lives. You die of a freak gasoline fight accident while you where on your way to the nearest fruit-shake shop attempting to purchase Orange Mocha Frappucino.

I wish all global conflicts could solve themselves...

granted but then all thw world leaders become pussies and aliens take over and eat your legs and replace them with an andy warholl painting



i wish i had a propetual motion machine

Granted, but the machine you obtained was not what you expected. Instead, you recieved a pendulum. Which still obides by the same rule of prepetual motion, but was not what you wanted.

I wish I didn't have to stay overnight at the clinic...

Quote:

perpetual motion –noun Mechanics. the motion of a theoretical mechanism that, without any losses due to friction or other forms of dissipation of energy, would continue to operate indefinitely at the same rate without any external energy being applied to it.

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Repetition is the mother of skill.

Granted the clinic wasnt accually a clinic but a crack house




i wish i had a job